Ramblings of a Quarantined Heart

Journal entry: April 13, 2020

Where there is no vision, the people perish; Proverbs 29:18

I have a vision. A vision that overwhelms me!

This reset has had me restless if you will. What should I be reflecting on Lord? What do I need to let go? I keep praying, waiting on the answers.

The thought occurred to me this morning that I am busy, I am so busy, but the reality of this issues is I MAKE MYSELF and KEEP MYSELF Busy ON PURPOSE. I am always searching, always looking, never able to find rest. Do you feel this way?

Let me clarify. I am not even necessarily busy doing things of importance. Busy checking social media, busy occupying my day with things that stimulate me, busy snacking, and busy keeping myself entertained.

So as I look around my home this morning I am starting to feel like I am becoming suffocated because of my business.. My loose ends, my unattractive flaws of always having my hands in something for the sake of feeling in control are officially caving in on me, and I am about to SCREAM!

But I don’t know how to stop!! I don’t know how to not keep my self busy doing things to keep me busy for the sake of it. I do not know how to simply this life I live. I am clueless, I am dumb. I need help!

I need to absorb some grace for this in this season. I need prayer for this vision, and wisdom to be guide.

More to come!

 

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