Diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis

I have started this post about a million times. I have thought about the words I would use to describe every detail of the harsh reality of those words spoken to me on December 10, 2020, but my heart isn’t there anymore to share just that. Maybe another day. Today I wanted to talk about the supernatural grace God has given me to live with this disease. I want to flip the script for just a second. I don’t want to come at this as unsympathetic, trust me I lived those initial days, and if I am being honest have to be careful not to slip back into the thoughts of fear that came during that season in my life. The Devil is always knocking, trying to get to me through those familiar thoughts and feelings. I tell him to get out of here with that mess.

The Devil is a liar.

This much I know to be true. The Bible even gives us forewarning. His only mission is to kill, steal, and destroy, but Jesus came so we would have life abundantly. I had this crazy notion to hide my MS at first. The enemy came at me hard. You see I am in an intercessory ministry and praying for people to get healed is what we do. When I couldn’t feel my feet and could hardly stand for long periods of time (MS ATTACk) during one of these special ministry moments I felt so defeated and pathetic. What faith could I help bring to the table for God for these people. I am just a wounded bird who can’t even fly right now. The enemy wanted me silenced and definitely not helping advance God’s Kingdom here on Earth!

Let me explain where I stand in this matter. I believe that God will Heal me. I believe that. I believe that he does not want me sick. I believe that this was not from him. This was not a lesson to teach me, or nor was this done because I had done something wrong. LIES! And if you are reading this, and you have been believing these horrible things I urge you to stop and listen. God loves you! He would never punish us because of something we did wrong in the past. 1 John 1:9-He says that if we accept his son Jesus as our Lord and Savior, and we confess we our sinners; he is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins, erased forever, as if we never sinned at all. The devil wants you in a self pity, self defeated stage. He wants you isolated, and he wants you powerless, because he knows that if you ever got wind of a renewed mind and a promise from the Lord, his schemes and weapons would be dismantled over your life. Yes even with a chronic illness.

So as much as I hate to say this; yes I have ms, yes it is a chronic illness, and yes I am fighting a monster that hasn’t left me yet. It is hard for me to admit that because deep down inside my spirit I know it’s only temporary. I know that I am bound by this here in the flesh UNTIL Jesus heals me, but my spirit is not! Praise God, it is not my FOREVER eternal condition, and it is not your FOREVER/ eternity as well! Oh, and it sURE as HECK is NOT MY IDENTITY! I am always ready and available if he wants to heal me today! 🙂

With the Right mindset and the Right measure faith and grace to believe, we can live very Happy, Joyful, Exciting, Adventurous, looooooong lives with a chronic illness. Why do I say that? Because it is what I believe! It is almost like a ha ha slap in the face because the enemy tried to put something else on us, that has no power over us because we are children of God. Hallelujah!!

So we must activate our faith! How do you do that? The Bible tells us that Jesus is the author and the perfecter of our faith. Hebrews 12:2 Pray and ask him for more faith to believe that we can still live free in him, no matter what medical labels are thrown on us, or terroist that try and high jack our immune system!

That sounds great, I know you are probably thinking, but I am not sure God has ever given me a promise. ?? That sounds new to me. If this is you I would encourage you to pray and ask the Lord for a Promise from him for this season.

In the mean time you can use the one he has given to me. He is a good Dad who shares with his children, and what he will do for me, he will do for you as well.

The morning before I went in for my very first MRI in October of 2020 I heard so clearly upon waking up to full consciousness. “My grace is sufficient for thee..”

I immediately got out my bible to find the scripture and read it allowed, tears flowing. I knew then I was about to hear the news I didn’t want to, as I had asked him to take this burden from me, and hope it wasn’t ms. I also knew he was with me.

2 Corinthians 12:9

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” There fore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Each and every day I wake up and I remind him of this Promise he made to me, and I also remind myself that he has my back, no matter what comes that day.

MS is not the mountain I wanted or even asked for, but with Faith to move mountains I will see the victory in the end, because I am more then a conqueror in Christ Jesus.

If you need some advice or someone to talk to please leave a comment. MS WARRIORS -You are not alone in your fight!

Grow in Grace

The darkness will come. Fear will creep in. It’s all apart of living right? But, it doesn’t have to be our permanent outcome, or our new identity. We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control how we will respond. In every moment God has always offered his grace to enable you to get through, to keep you strong, and to make you a fighter! You must fight! You must grow! Then, you must use your growth to empower, support, encourage others. What are we doing if we are not growing?

Full of life

Thought provoking question for you!

It is officially SummEr Time! Wooot, Wooot! ☀️

Thought Provoking question: If I am full of life and you are full of life in this present moment….then what are we doing with it?

Reflection from my perspective: I am cleaning out the cobwebs of the things that are not important, and don’t add value to my life. This list includes social media. I have a Scentsy side Business, so obviously I need a social marketing network connection so I can’t just jump off the bridge and delete the account. I have discovered thumbing down social media threads leaves me entertained and or excited but it’s only temporary, or I feel uninterested, annoyed, and………. with each passing second I without fail become olDeR!!! Sorry folks to disappoint, but I am NO time traveler. (That would be cool though!) I also would like to be more disciplined in writing. It is one of my creative outlets. I need to focus on letting go of toxic relationships and actually pour more into the cups of my family and friend relationships. I need to continue to pray for a positive renewed mind each morning and through out the day. I don’t have time to waste my life thinking things that do not align to the word of God. (So there goes all the complaining). I need to just keep pursuing Joy, and find things that make me laugh and smile and purposely surround myself with these things.

Your reflection from your perspective: You fill in the blank in the comments if you so wish, or privately answer on your own! 😜

When You Can’t Find What You Are Searching For

Living a counterfeit life of what’s trending and relevant to present times.

Do you ever feel a little lost in this world like me? I wish I could tell you that I have mastered the arts of all things pertaining to life in my short 35 years of existence on this planet, but sadly I can not. Don’t lose me, don’t click the back button yet.  I promise this is not a pessimistic blog post. I would like to think of it more as thought provoking, and a call to action! You see as much time as I spend searching the inter webs for insight, ideas, help, and entertainment, I ended up being stumped today as I could for the first time not find what it was I was searching for.

Of course, this got me thinking!

What if… sometimes we can’t emulate from someone else’s story line because we were not designed to? I mean yes we all know we are individuals created so intricately that we have our own finger prints, but if you stop and watch the patterns of this world, everything pertaining to life and life style’s are based on trends and relevance to the times by people we call influencers.

WHAAT!?

If you stop and think about how absolutely lame and boring that is to conform to the patterns of the present time are you actually becoming the person you were created to be, or a counterfeit of another someone in society? But, not only lame but also exhuasting and not really obtainable in our natural raw authientic state.

My point is, why do we search and think that what we are searching for exist when maybe we are suppose to create a life style no one else is currently living? What is our Why for our every day purpose of getting up and moving forward? I think if we can slow down and actually think for ourselves what out why is then we can create in our own dynamical way a lifestyle that is tailored for the way we were designed to be. What drives us, and what will be the rich ingredients to this self made original recipe that will sustain us and bring us happiness and purpose for our every day life? I think we tend to gravitate towards common interests because it makes us feel like we belong to something bigger then ourselves. Also, we don’t like to be alone. But how many times have we personally not been true to ourselves because deep down inside we aren’t truly what we become by default. I am not suggesting that we can’t have commonalities and simularities, but to not completely become all of what someone else has become for themselves. We can have commonalities but don’t be a complete copy of another, which creates sterotypes of people.

Don’t be a sterotype.

I don’t know about you but when I want to change, I dive into whatever this change is going to bring about. For example, diet. Say I want to become a vegetarian, so I do all the research, watch all the films, read all the books and blogs, and now I have laid a foundation for this new eating life style with knowledge and a game plan to roll it out. Every time I have searched for some one else’s way of doing life, every time, un doubtfully it has brought me to this place I am sitting her today. I am still in square one, reaching, searching, looking for a mold I can fit into. BUT WHY? Why can’t I create my own mold?

What if God created you and me to have our own molds, our own way of designing a life that ultimately glorifies Him? And, what if he did this because he knew this one mold we get to create with him for ourselves would bring about the most sincere self-confidence, self-value, and happiness? Our love for him of course being the anchored fondation to this formation.

I feel like before I can move on with this new way of thinking for myself, I need to get on my knees and I need to seek the Lord in prayer. I need to ask him to reveal to me what changes I can make that will sustain consistency and bring him glory. I need to look into every aspect of my every day routine. I need to consider where all my time and energy is going and what the return is on my investment.  I need to stop comparing my life to others, I need to stop focusing on the flaws when I don’t measure up to what I perceive as their success and my failures.

COVID Season has been a season to let go of idols, pause, and reset.

I have to go back to work in two weeks. Maybe this truth is the motivating factor of the new rush I am feeling to master manipulate a grand plan to create a routine that will help my family and myself slowly transition back into a normal life. After all, don’t we all want to live a life that maters? Don’t we all want to make every day count for something? Our time here is short, but eternity is forever. I would rather spend my energy and focus expanding the Kingdom down here on Earth, and leaving love behind, then waisting it all away on what is trending, and relevant to the times. Letting go of what society and this world gleams as awesome, wonderful, healthy, sexy, acceptable, and laying seeds into some deep God breathing soil that will grow a happy, and healthy family, Woman, Wife, Mom, Friend, and Co-Worker. Now, that sounds so much more realistic and EXCITING!

That’s God’s grace… to love us enough not to leave us lost! 😉 Grace to change, and grace to grow. I love this thing we call life!  I love my life absorbing grace!

I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic? Do you truly live a life that reflects who you are–who God created you to be, who you want to become, or are you happy living life pertaining to what everyone says is the right and favorable way to live? Do you emulate the life of others, or would you say you have created your own personal mold to fill? Drop your thoughts below!

 

Be Blessed-Ash’Leigh Harris

By Your Side

Cloud Heart

I was walking this morning trying to get some light exercise in because I’m soooo sore from starting back at the gym, listening to a teaching on the gift of exhortation, and this beauty caught my eye! When your beliefs in God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit are “relational” and not “religious “ in every detail of your ordinary day His presence is always by your side! ❤️😘🙌🏻

John 14:21
He who has My commandments and keeps them, it is he who loves Me. And he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and manifest Myself to him.”

📸 Filtered by color only!

🤍 Ash’Leigh Harris

I’m not good at being pushy

Yikes

Well.. my husband may argue that! :0)

So my friend got me into selling Scentsy last fall and, let me tell you, I had my reservations because I’m just not a pushy sales gal.

I do love Scentsy and have been buying wax cubes for the past few years from a friend so after 5 minuets of flirting with the idea of actually going for it and becoming a consultant, I was all in!

I would consider myself to be averagely successful at it, I mean I’m not a Star director or anything! Heck, I only have one team member, but what can I say is, it’s fun!

I actually really enjoy taking orders and then getting them all packaged when they come in to deliver to my customers! Give me any excuse to use cute cards, gift bags, and washi tape, and I’m all in baby!

I have always for ever and ever wanted to be able to sale things; preferably things I hand made. I have always been attracted to vendors at markets, and always dreamed maybe one day I could find or make something worth someone’s desire.

Scentsy just happens to be my vehicle to test the waters so to speak. But I’m writing tonight because I feel that doubt monster sneaking in. You know that ugly hairy one that whispers out of no where, “Dude, you are super annoying and your harassing everyone you know in your social media to buy your Scentsy!” And then I Start to slowly become insecure and feel weird and stupid.

I’m so not good at being super pushy and getting people to purchase from me!

I’m the worst at letting my own thoughts or maybe the enemies thoughts sabotage my happiness and my progress!

Am I the only one out there that goes through a roller coaster of emotions with like a lot that pertains to life?

I just don’t want to be “that” gal.

I also thank part of my problems are my inability to just stick to one thing and be happy with that one thing!

Embarrassingly I am “that” gal who currently has like 8 different books by her night stand! 😳 I’m totally not kidding! I read out of a certain one pertaining to the mood for that day! 🤦🏼‍♀️

So, I’m going to push through these insecurities trying to creep in on a Monday night at 11:44pm, put my phone up, say my prayers, and get some sleep.

Tomorrow is a new day, and a new opportunity for a joy filled life!

❤️ Ash’Leigh Harris

It Will Get Better

Promise

Photo credit Natural Life

I stumbled across this cute saying from my feed and it instantly reminded me of some hope and truth I recently read in my bible.


Check it out: “You see, every child of God overcomes the world, for our faith is the victorious power that triumphs over the world. So who are the world conquerors, defeating its power? Those who believe that Jesus is the Son of God.”
‭‭1 John‬ ‭5:4-5‬ ‭TPT‬‬

No one gets a carefree everything goes my way every day all the time life. If you think you know one of these people you are being deceived, or they are not being completely transparent and honest with you. We all experience disappointment and we all know how it feels when we feel defeated, but let this be a reminder that we are only going to be down for as long as we allow ourselves because We have access to the God who is love! Let him love you through life’s difficulties!


You are a WOrLd CONQUER! This truth is a GAME changer to whatever you might be facing today! 📸 credit @naturallife 👑

Follow me on Instagram @absorbing_grace

❤️ Ash’Leigh