Wrestling with Silence


Something that can sound so beautiful to an over worked, under appreciated, and over frazzled Mom.

I look forward to moments of silence.

Moms you know that awkward but yet peaceful silence that comes after the last child leaves your sight racing to the School doors. The peaceful silence that follows a loud and busy weekend, after the last child is tucked into their big cozy bed.

The silence of just being alone. It’s golden.

However lately I have been wrestling with the silence in my head.

I wanted to pursue my passion for writing.

I wanted to pursue a deeper intimate relationship with Christ.

I wanted to accomplish some goals in the gym.

I have prayed Freveretly over all these ambitions, these wants and desires I would like to see come to completion.

But nothing…

Just silence in my head.

I know even when I don’t feel like God is listening, He is always there.

I know that even when my mind is silent, I still have creativity bottled inside.

I’m at the tip of the hard and bumpy diving board. Bouncing slowly as I gain my momentum to take the plunge into the heavy waters of faith.

Silence for now. Silence as the crowds await as the diver plunges off the diving board to make a beautiful specitical of flips and spins we only dare dream of making, falling ever so gracefully as to not even make a big cannon ball splash upon entry of the cool pool.

Silence now… Waiting… Getting the courage up.. For the special performance followed by the loud rip roaring cries of the crowd when we finally dare to go all the way! Shouts and hand claps!!

Maybe your ecstatic crowd is a loved one, family, a friend, or maybe the crowd is just you.


Maybe it isn’t just a bad thing after all wrestling with the unknown of what lies before us.

Maybe it’s God’s ways of making us become still and know he is God and he is in control.


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