I confess that I was really afraid to become a sleeved Momma!
I would like to think that when you have your first child your identity of yourself transforms into one huge bubble that separates itself into two halves, the identity of yourself and the identity of their Mother.
Deciding on a tattoo sleeve took me a good two years. First I had to come up with a design , and second I had to really be for sure I really wanted to commit to permanent skin art for the rest of my life.
I remember all the areas of judgment I would struggle with every time I seriously thought about the consequences of my decision. My first initial struggle was what will my family think? I grew up in a small town in Texas where any tattoo any where was looked upon in a negative manner. I quickly put aside this fear. After all I was a grown woman! The Harsh judgments of other women, men, friends, people I knew, and strangers. I worried about my witness to others in my walk of faith. I read through my bible and discovered a few scriptures that gave me peace. I know in my heart that God doesn’t judge the outward appearance but the heart of a man/woman. I prayed about my wants and desires several times. I began to believe that if the art itself wasn’t leading someone to the evil dark side, then it would just be beautiful art on my body. Obviously being mature in my faith and getting a pitchfork and the words “born to raise hell” tattooed on my body would definitely be a stumbling long block to a new believer. It would also go against every fiber of my character as a woman after God’s on heart. ❤
For me the most difficult struggle that seemed to be the hardest to just overcome was my children.
What would they think?
Would I be an embarrassment to them?
Would their friends parents misjudge me and then not allow their kids to hang out with mine?
This was a hard pill to swallow and I really tried to patiently deal and come to grips with all these insecurities I had about becoming a sleeved Mom. (Now I do have to interject here that my husband has a sleeve on his right arm and has had it since our son was about 3 years old.)
More months went by and more time was spent on making a decision. I finally realized that I really did want this tattoo sleeve for me. I had my reasons and meaning behind the sleeve design, which is of a beautiful peacock. I knew I had to do this now or I would regret it later in life. So I talked it over with my children. I wanted to hear their thoughts and let them know that their opinions did mater to me. The decision was finally made and the first appointment was booked!
For me personally this sleeve represents the beauty of FREEDOM! More importantly for me, the freedom I receive in Christ by his abundant mercy, grace, and love. I am free to be me and you are free to be you. I also like to think of it as being an example to my children to be free and be strong, stand up for what you believe in, and just simply be who you are. Don’t settle, don’t mock, don’t be a copy, BE AN ORIGINAL!
It may not be as drastic as a huge tattoo for you, but whatever piece of you that is just screaming to come out of inside the MOM shell you hold together so well, embrace it and let it shine through the Mom shell. Trust me you are doing yourself, your children, your spouse no favor by holding back who you are in the other half of that identity bubble. You are cheating them out of a wonderful, creative, fun MOM and wife!! We are all way too harsh and critical of ourselves. We hide behind those FEARS of cruel and harsh judgments we think other woman are thinking about us. I bet you that there are a lot of women out there who hold back just because of these fears, which are just false evidence appearing real. Who cares anyways what others think?
What better day, then on Mother’s Day to reflect on your MOM bubble and figure out how to pop the line of separation of being you, and being their mom! BE you, Be BEAUTIFUL!
*I did explain to my children after each ink session how much it hurts and that they really do not need to consider getting ink until they are almost 30 ;0) if that is something they choose to do!!!
HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!