It’s Valentine’s Day and I am dumping You

It’s February the month of LOVE. Typically you see new romance blossom and bloom. Love is in the air.

This is no romantic love note my dear. I guess there is no sweet way to say this, so please forgive me for being so blunt, but I  don’t have it in me to continue this fling we have going on.

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First of all you suffocate me with your presence! Your EVERY WHERE! I can’t go anywhere alone with out you following my every move. I mean your at the store, the doctors office, the dry cleaners, the bank, the grocery mart, my work place, and even hiding out at my friends houses! You only thought you were sneaky, think again!

You make me act like a needy little school girl with a puppy dog love crush. My behavior has turned into one of those obnoxious “I can’t live with out you or I will die” kind of senseless ones. When I am stressed out, I need you. When I am feeling depressed, I need you. When I am happy, I want you. When I am bored, I want you and need you. I could go on with all different sorts of scenarios but well you don’t need to know all my weaknesses! I have become extremely co-dependent!

I can’t concentrate on any one thing because you consistently nag me like a retail shoe sells men working only on commission all the time with your sweet promises to satisfy me which you don’t. Okay I am LYING!! You satisfy me but for like maybe 10 to 30 seconds at a time. I am excited for a whole second until I can no longer taste your sweet delicious goodness on my tongue any more. Our encounters usually end up leaving me with a hangover or a severe stomachache, trying to consume enough of you to fulfill my desires at one time.

You whisper sweet nothings into my ear as I walk by you. YOU Tease!

Don’t you want me baby, don’t you want me OOOHH!?   (In my mind I have created this serenade from you to me.)

The Sweet nothings and taunts go a little like this:

“Look at me, I’m so DELICOUS! Just one bite that’s all you need.” “Look at me I am “fun size.” It’s not even like you are getting all of me. Just a little bit of my love wont hurt you girl!”                                 “You have been good all day, you Deserve me!”                                        “No one has to know!”

The hardest part about you to swallow is the cold hard fact that you are a LYING NO GOOD CHEATER!! I heard Courtney talking about how delicious you were to her as well. It’s not even just her, apparently like ALL WOMEN have had some of you! You dog! Here I was thinking I was your one and only, like we had something special.

Your mind controlling powers lead to a serious distraction of my own needs.

I often tend to put your first. Ugh I hate myself!

You leave me with guilt and resentment for days. This guilt and resentment is what drives me to depression which leads me finding you and its a vicious cycle that never ends!

You wreck my self control! I keep telling myself I am going to quit you, but I keep going back for more and more!

You are no good for my self esteem. That’s right, you make me feel FAT! The more of you I consume, the larger my med section becomes. The uglier I feel!

You spike my insulin and can actually cause me to become a diabetic with too much consumption of you. You murderer. It’s like a FATAL ATTRACTION!

After much thought and consideration to the long term harmful effects this relationship has on me, I have decided it is time for me to take you out like yesterday’s trash!

That is right, I am breaking up with you CHOCOLATE!!

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Oh, and I don’t need you trying to come crawling back into my life either. You’re not sneaky popping up on fruit, or bacon, or popcorn, so don’t even try to attempt that!

WE ARE OVER!

You are no good, your no good, your no good, baby your no good! (signing out loud)

 

xoxo

Leigh Leigh

Please follow my BLOG Leigh Leigh Speaks and follow me HERE on Facebook or HERE on Twitter!

chocolate bar photo credit: fanpop.com and picmonkey for edits

Never again! Bad dreams and co-sleeping with your child! #momstruggle

My babies are older now. It’s been a good four year since we have had a little bitty baby in the house. Some days I miss that. Mine are 5 and 8 now.

Some nights I lay awake day dreaming about how I wish they were still little enough to snuggle with at night. Little warm and lavender smelling heaters to keep you warm and cozy all night. I would long for a night they would ask to sleep with us because they were afraid of a shadow on the wall of some sort.

It just doesn’t really happen here.

In those day dreams this is exactly what I had envisioned……

See isn’t this so sweet!!? Momma Cat is snuggling baby cat keeping her little safe and sound. Awe… No more bad dreams baby, Mommy is here!

Can I just interrupt this mushy moment with a little dose of reality!?

Well it finally happened last night! Our 5 year old daughter came bolting in our room tears and all with that sweet little innocent voice: “Daddy I want you!”

“Okay get in the middle of us!”

That warm sweet lavender scented soft baby has vanished leaving me with a sleepy, whiney, very boney, sweaty ball of a mess child! She didn’t smell so sweet, or lovely for that matter! More like Chicken Nuggets and Cheetos, laced with smelly feet!

I can’t recall much but if I could paint you a picture I am pretty sure my night looked a lot like these pictures to follow..

We started the night out in my favorite sleeping position. Momma on her back! Now imagine a life size 5 year old on my tummy, and I am not quiet that wide! 🙂

That position left me winded and uncomfortable so I rolled over onto my side. This is where her sweaty hair was suffocating me!

I manage to push her off my face and try this half side, half stomach position.

I suspect we got away with this co-sleeping position for a good portion of the night. Well, until my shoulder started to hurt and my side began to ache!

I decided it was time to give the whole tummy position a run for it’s money! After all it’s probably close to 2 in the morning and I am beginning to feel severely UNCOMFORTABLE!

Oh brother.. I am going Apes, Bananas!!

Why can’t she roll over and sleep next to her DADDY!? It was HE WHO LET THE LITTLE DARLING INTO OUR BED! Why ME, Why ME!? Why am I the only one being pressed down on, kicked, slapped, elbowed, kneed, sweated, and slobbered on!!!!??

She is Child by day, Ninja Warrior by night!

image found on yahooimages

image found on http://www.fanpop.com

HELP! I can’t even breath at this point!

*imagine found at 3.bp.blogspot.com

*imagine found at 3.bp.blogspot.com

And She has the nerve to wake up looking like this!

“Good Morning Momma!”

I am all like, “Good morning Kenna!”

My body feels like I just fought off a bull in my sleep all night!

Dodge this leg, dodge that elbow

Dodge this leg, dodge that elbow

Spanish bull fighter Jose Tomas

Spanish bull fighter Jose Tomas

NEVER AGAIN! NEVER!!!!! My back hurts, my arms hurt, my neck is stiff, I am sore all over!

So thank you DADDY and thank you POPPA for letting her watch that Scary Movie. I think if she comes back again, I am moving to the couch!

🙂 The countless joys of Motherhood!

Here is an actually picture of proof just how crazy our night was last night!!!

goodmorning

Smile,

Leigh Leigh

Be sure to check out MY KIDS ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY HERE FOR MORE LAUGHS!

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9 Things Learned from a cRAZy Busy Month #motherhoodstruggles FUNNY

To make light of the Chaotic Month of October here is an insert straight from my *TOP SECRET* Journal!

9 Things I learned from what seemed like the craziest month of my LIFE!

#1 When your memory fails you, there are emails, text messages, and social media posts to retain every moment of our life! (Maybe it’s not so bad for you after all to be an addict!??)

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#2 When given any opportunity to sit still long enough, or lie horizontal you will fall asleep on accident and maybe even snore or drool because your body is so sleep deprived from going non stop!

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#3 “Mommy Time Outs” are FOR REAL and when used in moderation (10-20 minuets after you come home from work, or just anytime in your day) will SAVE your afternoon and your SANITY!

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#4 Gym stretchy leggings will become apart of your daily casual wear and you can be okay with this! Why? Well all the hours of cardio and weight lifting are sculpting some nice legs!

(sorry no selfie..will work on this though!) 😉

#5  If you ditch your make up, made up hair style, and decide to skip the contacts and wear your glasses all day including public outings, your kids will question if you are okay! (My son was very puzzled when I picked him up from school after work looking like a scrub! “Mom are you okay?”) LOL

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#6 PB&J on a tortilla is a wonderful back up sandwich when you run out of bread on a Thursday morning.

#lunchtimestruggles

#7 There are still NO EXCUSES for MISSING morning runs! These make you feel better!

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#8 If you feed your kids cereal for DINNER (because it’s 30 minuets past their bed time due to a football game) they will announce to the world, shout it off the roof tops that you ARE “THE BEST MOM EVER!!” (I have waited my whole life for that moment-thank you cereal!) 😉

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#9 If you have to skip out on laundry and cleaning up your chaotic dirty house, the mess will not disappear or disown you, it will be waiting patiently for your attention multiplying by the seconds!

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WOW I feel so much more knowledged! I’m SO happy and thrilled I had to endure craziness to learn such fascinating things! 🙂

 

GO Busy Mommas ALL OVER THE WORLD!!

WE ROCK!

Leigh Leigh

Follow my blog! Follow me on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/leighleighspeaks or Twitter @ash_leighharris.

My Kids are Driving ME CRAZY

Ever have one of these days where you are asking yourself this very question?

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Well I have some GOOD NEWS for YOU!

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🙂

You can spot children out quickly because like everything you tell them to do, they will completely ignore! (This goes especially for my 4 year olds!)

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And we don’t want to leave out the TEENAGERS and all their 5,487….(mood swing’s)

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OR the Whining..

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and the Tattle tailing every 5 minuets!!!

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Dinner time will never be the same…

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I mean seriously, I have yet to understand how a four year old can live off of lunch meat every meal….LUNCH MEAT!???????

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Mommy TIME OUTS are regular part of your day and you better bet your bottom dollar you will enforce this rule..

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But no matter how stressful and tired and run down they may have you feeling today, you can always guarantee some good ol’ love and hugs are in order!

 

Why?

Because they ABSOLUTELY ADORE YOU!

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And this is why we wouldn’t change a thing about motherhood!! 🙂

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Motherhood is AWESOME!!!    🙂

drive me crazy

I hope this brought a smile to your face!

xoxo

Leigh Leigh

Follow my blog here, and Facebook http://www.facebook.com/leighleighspeaks , Twitter @ash_leighharris!

I would love to hear some funny Motherhood stories!! Comment bellow!

 

 

 

24 Hours of NO COMPLAINING Challange completed

 

 

3set

Let me first say, there were ample amounts of moments where I literally had to force my hands over my mouth to keep quiet!

I witnessed a little anxiety along with slight anger rising up in me yesterday as I completed tasks on my to do list with four children. So what did my day look like exactly? Let me explain!

7:10am I woke up to a text message from my dear Step Son. He didn’t make it to practice this morning and had requested a ride to the gym at 6:50am. I did not receive this message because I was off in dream land. When I hurried to get ready to take him, he decided it was too late and didn’t want to go.

I also woke up with this huge painful bump on my left arm pit (What? Really who gets a bump on their arm pit?) I shrugged it off, oh well, it will eventually go away I decided. No complaining over a painful bump.

8:41am After closing my notebook after writing my blog vowing to not complain for the next 24 hours, I grabbed my phone to check the email.  My phone had completely froze as in it was not powering on at all. In a panic I began to push buttons to reset it, nothing, it was lifeless. I know it wasn’t dead because I had like a 86% charge when I woke that morning. I kind of chuckled to myself and proceeded to plug it up, of course it came on and I was able to check my email.

I spent the next 3 hours cleaning my home. We just returned from a week and a half vacation and I do not clean on VACATION! 😉 The house was very much out of order and needed lots of TLC on my part to nurse it back to a soft place to land for dear Husband when he would arrive home from work in the afternoon. During the course of these three hours I got to listen to my children complain about several things. I just kept going, kept positive, and focused on completing the house cleaning. While I was cleaning up the living room, my cat, Thaddeus, decided he wanted to act like a crazy monkey while I was vacuuming. He jumped on the table beside my couch and knocked over my new lamp. As it went crusading to the floor, I thought, NOOOOO, please, please don’t tell me it broke. He has never done this before. I knew right away it was a trap to get me to stumble. I quickly set the lamp up and proceded to straighten the metal part the lamp shade sits on. It was very crooked after the fall. The lamp shade was going to survive the fall. (yea!)

*I should have recorded this with a picture, but my camera was in the other room and of course taking a picture was the last thing on my mind!

I surived the complaints my children made over the lunch I prepared for them. “I didn’t want ham, I wanted turkey.” “Mom, she got more chips then me!” The list of complaints continued. I gritted my teeth, and smiled. After all it was just 12 o’clock, I got this I thought to myself! Piece of cake!

Then it happened, you know the realization of knowing you have to take your taking children into PUBLIC and removing your children from the confined walls of their fortress! If your a Mom then you know what I am talking about. Once you escape your safe fortress your children turn into the creatures you can’t quiet recognize in public settings, the Nice Mommy face comes on and they know they are about to get away with murder!!!

 Yes I was about to attempt the unthinkable………….Doctor appointment with four KIDS!

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Dear Step Son had to get his Physical for the upcoming football season so we got to wait on him for about 45 minuets. Incase you are wondering when we left this building it was around 2:15pm. I got to literally listen to my 7 year old Son complain for the whole duration of the wait. “Mom, I am so bored. There is nothing to do here!” I am not exatruting when I say, this rant was repeated over, and over, and over again. The anxiety was about to start setting in. Could I sit here and watch them make the waiting room into their own personal circus ring? I mean a few fish in a tank can only occupy these crazies for so long! LOL Crazies because that is what they turn into when you take them to a waiting room! Although I am very proud of myself. I feel like I kept my composure and with the exception of my 7 year old, no one was embarrassed. We survived and no Mommy complaints. ZIIIING!

Our public outings where not complete after the doctor visit. Now it was time to tackle the Grocery Shopping for this week! Again, as a Mom, you know how well behaved your children will act while Mommy shops diligently and gracefully for groceries. (HA)

store

 

I believe this shopping experience lasted about 45 minuets. I did however have the lovely opportunity to have my dear Step Son step on my flip flop, causing me to almost face plant right smack on the floor, however I am thankful to add that there was no planting of my face that day. One flip flop went flying out infront of me, and my other foot got a boo boo where the flip flop thong rubs against your big two and that toe beside it, right in front of two Ladies having a conversation in the middle isle of Wal-Mart. Mean while I can hear something of the sounds of Dear Step Son yelling “OH flat tire, and Sorry!”  Needless to say I was embarrassed as I hurried to grab my shoe and place it back on my foot, so I could go hide in a hole somewhere. I Didn’t react to it, I was just ready to be checked out and headed home.

Parking lot, shoes, Bubble Gum. Yup you guessed it. Can you believe that on the way to the car I actually stepped in ABC Gum? LOL (Already been chewed) I remember ABC gum was a topic back in my childhood days. Sorry, getting off track focus Ash’Leigh! FOCUS! It just all seems so humors to me now! 🙂

gum

 

When I took my first step and it stuck for a slight three seconds longer to the pavement, I knew I had felt that heavy sensation before. I had stepped in bubble gum. As you can notice from the image above, I didn’t just step in gum! No, this gum was apparently alive and decided to JUMP on my flip flop. It was a sticky mess. Immediately I just laughed. Not a little chuckle or a giggle, no this was like a Panic Laugh. I think I really wanted to cry but all I knew to do was laugh! Laugh hard, loud, rambunctiously. It had quickly become a very stressful day, but I REFUSED to give up on my challenge! I scrapped my shoe across the parking lot, hopped in my car, and drove home.

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Here are my kids leaving the store, as you can see after the doctors appointment and grocery shopping trip they were as worn out as Momma was!

3 O’clock was our present living time. I gave a 60 minuet warning to my girls to finish cleaning the upstairs. Mind you this was a task that they had been working on all morning and still was not even half way complete!

4O’Clock Yea my Husband is home from a hard days work. This is where I needed to pull out the tape to tape my mouth shut because there is just something wired in a woman to want to spew every hardship she encountered that day with the children while Daddy was away. I smiled, grinned, kissed, and hugged him, keeping my lips super glued.

This took a lot out of me, but it was do able!

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5pm Gym time. I encountered my friends that I haven’t seen in over a week and a half.  It was so nice to talk to each one of them. However, I picked up very quickly how hard it was not to complain about something that had happened over the trip, or anything else for that matter. We are quick and sneaky with our complaints. Heck, half the time I don’t even realize we are saying them. But again, I quickly focused on other things to talk about and kept it positive! No complaining from me! 🙂

7pm dinner and baths.

10pm BED!

I woke up this morning at 5:20am to make my husband a lunch for his day. I had to wake my smaller children up around 6:30 to take big brother to summer strength and conditioning practice. I prayed, prayed, and prayed God would give me the strength this morning to make it until 8:40am. It was quiet hectic early morning and so to my surprise, when my daughter used my kitchen towel to clean up some cat poop that some how made its way on her leg,

I lost it! Out it came.. “Why do you always get Momma’s good things dirty!! I use this to dry my hands off in the kitchen while I am preparing meals. NASTY!!”

How she even got cat poop on her leg is way beyond my reasoning at this point. I knew I had just complained out loud!

But guess what!?

It was 9:00am WHEW

I MADE IT!!!!

 

I will blog tomorrow about my reflection of this challenge. I have learned so much and I most certainly recommend everyone to take this challenge. If you took this challenge with me and were successful I want to know! If you weren’t successful I want to know too! Did you learn anything more about yourself or others?

Don’t forget to stay in touch! Like me on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/leighleighspeaks Tweet me http://www.twitter.com/ash_leighharris or sign up for email updates on new posts here!

xOxO

-Leigh Leigh

 

The Flower child

Hippie-flower_-_Virginia_-_ForestWander

 

Kenna, my four year old daughter, is a complete joy and blessing. She has been a go get her since birth. She is my baby out of the bunch and she has just always had this way about her that oozes free spirit. You would find her shoulder deep in side walk chalk and candy as a toddler, and now her favorite past time is collecting bugs, dead or alive, she doesn’t mind.

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She enjoys the earth and all its dirt and glory, but she still loves to dress up in her princess dresses and put on make up with Momma’s high Heels.

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She may be a “Classy” Flower girl, if there was ever such a thing! She has recently asked me if she could sleep in just her shorts like her brother does! Which I followed up with , “When you are an adult living on your own, you may wear whatever you would like to sleep in, but for now let’s keep the jammies on!”

I promised the kids I would take them swimming when we returned home today from Mommies work out time at the Gym. When we stepped foot in our home, I hurried to make lunches and they scrambled to find their bathing suits. Handling typical Momma pre pool responsibilities, I was the last to get my gym clothes off and get changed, and just like clock where right as I am changing my shirt, Kenna bursts into my room unannounced to announce some nonsense none the less. I really think kids just have this six sense that tells them when Mom is not available and would prefer to remain unavailable to them, you know, bathroom breaks and other sorts! 😉

“Mom!” She blurts out!

I replied with a silent, “What?”

“YOU HAVE BRAS ON?” (Not to confuse you, I am not a freak of nature that requires two, as in plural, bras on at one time, she has always called a bra a bras!)

“WHY MOM!?”

I answered calmly, ” Well of course I do, it’s a sports bra Kenna, Mommies wear those when they work out.”

“WELL I DON’T LIKE THAT MOM, I DON’T LIKE IT WHEN YOU WEAR BRAS!”

At this moment, I am completely puzzled.

“Why Kenna, Why does this bother your or concern you that I have a sports bra on? Remember I told you before all women wear them.”

I almost couldn’t contain my laughter when she responded with such horror in her voice and shock on her face.

“I DON’T WANT YOU TO BE THE CRAZY MOM WHO WEARS BRAS!”

That was the completion of that conversation. I didn’t even have the words to respond!

I have to say I still sit here giggling just as dumbfounded as I was when the words first jumped off her lips trying to figure out why on earth wearing a “bras” would make me “The Crazy Mom!”

Wasn’t the “The Crazy Mom” the Lady who goes out in public with no bra on!? 🙂

So this concludes my suspicions as to why there isn’t a shadow of the doubt, that I am absolutely raising the next Flower Child.  I sure hope this mind set of hers changes before we hit middle school, or we may just have some bumping of the heads! I have decided it is not a bad ideal to pray for grace now for the days to come with Miss Kenna!

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I love that little girl to pieces! ❤

xoxo

-Leigh Leigh

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